So, there’s this video…it’s a guy in a Santa suit…riding his hoverboard…and he eventually crashes into the tree.

Why does this tick me off?

For the simple reason…that these stupid, stupid “hoverboards” even exist.

#1…they are not hoverboards…they do NOT HOVER! They have wheels. This is a direct violation of what a hoverboard should be.

#2…these do not need to exist. I saw 2 people riding around on them yesterday at Jordan Creek…one guy was at his kiosk, going around in a circle while texting on his phone. First off, way to really sell me on it…second of all, you look darn right goofy.

Not nearly as goofy though as the guy at Scheels who was riding his around the store…and wearing a helmet….I’m sure you could get injured on one of these things…but still, c’mon. Come…on. Then wear kneepads & elbowpads too, right? Go with the whole get up.

I know these things won’t catch on…I can think of a hundred different ways to look like a fool without having to spend close to $500. #iwokeuplikethis

Again…these…are…NOT….hoverboards. May I interest you in my hoverbike? It’s actually land-based…has two wheels…but if you can refer to this thing as a hovering conveyance, than I will as well.

Behold…my HOVERSHOES.

So…so…dumb.