Go ahead…take away my Iowa card…I’m turning my back on an Iowan staple.

I enjoy the Iowa State Fair…I look forward to going to the State Fair. I’ll try just about any food out there…and I look forward to trying out any new food at the Fair…but there is one food that will be nowhere…NOWHERE….near me…

The Corn Dog.

Kurt…how can you dislike the corn dog? 

Simple…they’re gross. That breading on the corn dog makes me gag just thinking about it. The texture is a mush…and I know many will argue, “Well, if it’s mushy, that means it’s a bad one“.

If that’s the case…then I’ve always had a bad one. Even when it’s a crispy, what do you call it…a crust…breading??….even when it’s a crispy whatever, it still turns to a mush.

They should switch out the Cow Chip Throwing Contest to the “Corn Dog Throwing Contest”…it’s the same thing.

I’ve attempted to try a corn dog once a year…my kids will get one, or something like that, and I will think “Hey, maybe my taste buds have changed and this will be the year I like corn dogs”…and the answer is always a resounding “No it is not”. One bite of a corn dog, and I pine for a taste of the vile weed known as broccoli.

I’ve tried all sorts of sauces…mustard, ketchup (but then I realized I have put ketchup essentially on a hot dog, which is a sin)….buffalo wing sauce…anything to try and make these vomits-on-a-stick taste edible…and nothing works.

When I hear people say “I can’t wait to get to the State Fair for a corn dog“…I question your sense of taste…were your taste buds burned off in some horrible deep-fryer accident, is that why you can’t taste the disgustingness (not a a real word, but it fits)?

NOTE: My daughter LOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVESS corn dogs…and yes, I question her taste buds. 🙂